Pre-game

 Inspiration hits, unleash the gift to all that dare to bear witness

says the little ringmaster in my head but I dread opening the doors to the darkness of the circus. She said....

Once upon a time that was me, giving in to reality to appeal to the masses, but like molasses here comes the thick, bittersweet, darkness of it all. The discovery that segued to the call, and opened up an unforgetable level of understanding. Now demanding my time, it is Me. I've studied not only the guilty mind but the mind of the mentally strained. Gained insight on how to spot a lie and the depiction of body language. The anguish I get knowing I've been trained to decipher things about you that you may be unsure of about yourself, and yet you are sure enough to disappoint me by not knowing me at all.

As a child we learn to do as we're told and no one wants your opinion, driven to stay quiet, move like stealth through a riot and walk with your head held high. Wise for the adults to protect our adolescence and keep us on a need to know. and as we grow we become vital to the process. Creating our own boundaries and rules to abide by. I now rely on my intuition, who has been imprisoned for so long. Strung along as free labor to the state, waiting to be chosen for parole but passed by everytime. Defined by societies labels, when it's designed to disable negativity. Set it free! I must and provide intuitive restoration to my dysfunctional being, who all this time was believing in Me to lead.

Living and breathing in a bubble of togetherness and growing pains from the inception of my sons birth, until a tiny pin pierced the bubble forever, making forever a never in this reality. I welcomed leeches, ghostwrote speeches and catered to those I thought were deserving. and somehow I'm grateful for what I've learned and I'm still observing.